Aug. 29, 2025

What If You've Been Funny All Along? Comedy and Humor in Midlife with Lynn Harris (Ep. 46)

What If You've Been Funny All Along? Comedy and Humor in Midlife with Lynn Harris (Ep. 46)

You’ve probably heard that laughter is the best medicine, and science agrees. But did you know that being funny isn’t something you’re either born with or not? My guest today, Lynn Harris, founder of Gold Comedy, is here to show us that everyone can learn to tap into humor—yes, even you.

In this episode, Lynn shares how comedy is not only a tool for entertainment but also for empowerment, especially for women over 40 and 50 navigating midlife changes. We talk about why women are often conditioned to laugh at jokes instead of making them, how comedy builds confidence, and why humor is such a powerful form of self care.

Lynn also gives practical advice for midlife women who might want to try comedy for fun, personal growth, or even as a new career path. Whether you dream of stepping on stage, adding more lightness into your conversations, or simply boosting your self confidence, this conversation will inspire you to see your funny side in a whole new way.

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • Why midlife is the perfect time to embrace your funny side
  • How comedy builds confidence and connection
  • Practical steps to notice humor in everyday life
  • Why humor is one of the most powerful forms of self care for women in midlife

Resources and links mentioned in this episode:

💛 Join us in Midlife Pivot on Patreon to hear my bonus conversation with Lynn about how to actually get started with comedy - and what we think about the idea of being "too much": www.patreon.com/mindyourmidlife.

 

Text me to ask a question - I'll answer on the podcast!

Support the show

🌸 Liked this episode? Share it with fellow midlife women over 40 navigating hormone balance, an empty nest, and self-confidence!

🫶 Love this show? Leave a review to help more women over 50 find us.

💡Want support through menopause, mindset shifts, or midlife transitions?
Book a free Mindset Coaching / Intro Call: cherylpfischer.com/coaching, and join us in Midlife Pivot on Patreon.

Let’s talk self-care, self-talk, and owning your next chapter—without the “midlife crisis” narrative.

Connect with Cheryl: Instagram | LinkedIn | Website

00:00 - Laughter as Powerful Medicine

08:15 - Can Anyone Learn to Be Funny?

16:56 - Breaking Gender Barriers in Comedy

25:44 - Finding Your Comedy Style

34:30 - How to Start Your Comedy Journey

39:55 - Key Takeaways and Final Thoughts

WEBVTT

00:00:00.820 --> 00:00:08.329
I will eat my hat if you have not heard the saying laughter is the best medicine.

00:00:08.329 --> 00:00:16.844
And I'm already chuckling at myself because it's kind of silly how often I say I will eat my hat.

00:00:16.844 --> 00:00:20.751
Number one, that's kind of a ridiculous saying and it's old.

00:00:20.751 --> 00:00:22.507
And number two, I don't even wear hats.

00:00:22.507 --> 00:00:23.704
I don't think they look good on me.

00:00:23.704 --> 00:00:29.707
Anyway, laughter is so, so, so powerful.

00:00:29.707 --> 00:00:35.036
It changes the biochemistry in our body.

00:00:35.036 --> 00:00:43.994
I am going to link in the show notes the episode I did with Kathy Nesbitt about laughter yoga.

00:00:43.994 --> 00:00:54.014
With Kathy Nesbitt about laughter yoga, and now we're kind of taking it a different way because we tell ourselves too often that we aren't that funny or that we could never make it.

00:00:54.014 --> 00:00:56.225
But anybody could be funny.

00:00:56.225 --> 00:00:58.392
So let's talk about it.

00:00:59.920 --> 00:01:05.370
Welcome to Mind your Midlife, your go-to resource for confidence and success.

00:01:05.370 --> 00:01:20.019
One thought at a time, unlike most advice out there, we believe that simply telling you to believe in yourself or change your habits isn't enough to wake up excited about life or feel truly confident in your body.

00:01:20.019 --> 00:01:29.349
Each week you'll gain actionable strategies and oh my goodness, powerful insights to stop feeling stuck and start loving your midlife.

00:01:29.349 --> 00:01:32.248
This is the Mind your Midlife podcast.

00:01:32.248 --> 00:02:23.325
You are in your 40s, your 50s, your 60s, somewhere around that range most likely, and you are in a period of life where there's a lot of change, and maybe one of the things that has been on your mind during all this change is that you wonder if you could be funny, and maybe you mean it in the sense that you'd love to be funny with your friends, or maybe you mean it in a sense that you'd love to be a comedian or you'd love to write funny things or you'd love to be on social with comedy, and you just always thought about it and you just always thought about it.

00:02:23.325 --> 00:02:29.229
Well, now might be exactly the right time Now for me.

00:02:30.330 --> 00:02:44.206
I was always shy and I still have aspects of this, and it's interesting because unless people have experienced the same thing I have, they generally don't believe me.

00:02:44.206 --> 00:02:46.381
When I say this, I'm being completely, 100% honest.

00:02:46.381 --> 00:03:10.222
As a kid, I was very shy, one on one, and I was kind of always looking for a group, because I'm also an extrovert and I get energy from people Strange combo maybe, or unusual combo maybe, or unusual combo, I don't know.

00:03:10.222 --> 00:03:12.687
Now, as you might guess, I have absolutely no qualms talking to a group, training a group.

00:03:12.687 --> 00:03:15.854
I do that a lot in my personal and professional life.

00:03:15.854 --> 00:03:34.311
I'm absolutely cool with large groups, but I still get shy one-on-one sometimes and unfortunately and you'll know this if you're similar sometimes it comes across as being maybe not friendly, and I never want that to be the case.

00:03:35.231 --> 00:03:52.985
So one of the things that was suggested to me at one point to help me come out of my shell was to do an improv class or to learn more about comedy, and I really, really love the idea of making people laugh and gosh.

00:03:52.985 --> 00:03:54.835
I'd love for my friends to weigh in and my family and tell me if this is true.

00:03:54.835 --> 00:03:55.879
But I think I do make people laugh.

00:03:55.879 --> 00:03:57.643
I love to laugh.

00:03:57.643 --> 00:04:03.245
I know how healthy it is and if healthy plus fun, I mean, come on, how many things are healthy and fun.

00:04:03.245 --> 00:04:07.104
But I also don't want to be self-deprecating all the time.

00:04:07.104 --> 00:04:08.828
That's not good for our mindset.

00:04:08.828 --> 00:04:13.443
We've discussed that for sure in previous episodes.

00:04:13.443 --> 00:04:24.790
So I want to learn more about how does this actually work and how might you be able to dip a toe or jump all the way in to being funny?

00:04:25.290 --> 00:04:28.394
And so my guest today is Lynn Harris.

00:04:28.394 --> 00:04:32.185
She is the founder of Gold Comedy.

00:04:32.185 --> 00:04:55.951
Gold Comedy is a comedy school, professional network and content studio where women and really everyone can grow a comedy career, can come up with kind of a creative side hustle and can build a powerful community based around laughter and being funny.

00:04:55.951 --> 00:04:58.795
What a cool idea.

00:04:58.795 --> 00:05:02.324
Lynn founded Gold Comedy.

00:05:02.324 --> 00:05:20.730
Lynn learned when she was a teenager how funny she could be and also realized she was often the only woman actually doing comedy in whatever scenario she was in, and so she wanted to change that for the rest of us.

00:05:20.730 --> 00:05:22.634
Welcome, lynn.

00:05:22.634 --> 00:05:24.262
Thank you so much for having me.

00:05:24.262 --> 00:05:33.233
Okay, is it possible, in your opinion, for anybody who's listening to learn to be funny?

00:05:33.233 --> 00:05:37.663
I don't know if they're wanting to do stand-up or they just want to be a funny person.

00:05:37.663 --> 00:05:40.389
Is it really possible for anybody to do that?

00:05:40.850 --> 00:05:44.208
Yes, and I'll go on, but like full stop.

00:05:44.208 --> 00:05:51.110
Everyone has different styles, everyone has different and, yes, of course, everyone has different kind of ingrained skills.

00:05:51.110 --> 00:05:54.990
You know, like some people are more intuitive cooks than others.

00:05:54.990 --> 00:06:01.408
You know some people are more intuitive athletes than others, or with particular sports or music or whatever it is.

00:06:01.408 --> 00:06:05.742
So of course there's a range of you know how easily something comes to you.

00:06:05.742 --> 00:06:08.011
We all have that with everything we do in our lives.

00:06:08.011 --> 00:06:11.262
But no one can get good at comedy without working at it.

00:06:11.262 --> 00:06:12.745
No one, not one person.

00:06:13.047 --> 00:06:14.831
Seinfeld's work ethic is famous.

00:06:14.831 --> 00:06:16.862
Yes, correct, no one, there is.

00:06:16.862 --> 00:06:18.326
No, there is no such thing.

00:06:18.326 --> 00:06:27.305
And the other and this is related, but not the same People like to say that an overnight success takes about 10 years.

00:06:27.324 --> 00:06:28.168
So, yeah, so it all involves work, will it?

00:06:28.168 --> 00:06:29.452
Will some of that work feel harder to some than others?

00:06:29.452 --> 00:06:32.262
Yes, but if you have the right instructor who's really?

00:06:32.262 --> 00:06:44.766
Or the right, just whatever if you're in the right environment where the people around you inspire you to like be, you know, kind of make you funnier, you know, like, if you have really funny college friends, you get funnier, you know, yeah, yeah.

00:06:44.766 --> 00:06:58.000
Or if your instructor is really skilled at um, helping you kind of uncover your natural persona, like who your persona is on stage, which is generally just kind of 1.3 times who you already are.

00:06:58.000 --> 00:07:00.225
There are some exceptions, but it's generally you.

00:07:00.225 --> 00:07:12.949
And if that same person can help you really mine your own life for material, that's not funny on its face but has comedy available in it.

00:07:12.949 --> 00:07:27.420
It's not about the wacky thing that happened to you or making fun of other people, it's like what is the sort of normal but normal but multidimensional stuff in your life that actually is fodder for comedy.

00:07:27.420 --> 00:07:42.632
If there's someone who can help you kind of, who can mirror it back to you and help you sort of figure out what's funny about it to you and then apply kind of universal joke mechanics, then, yes, everyone can come out with some comedy, everybody.

00:07:42.632 --> 00:07:49.096
And then what comes next is you know what are your goals and how hard do you, how hard are you interested in working for them?

00:07:49.096 --> 00:07:55.663
If you're interested in just having fun, then that's great, and if you're, if you're interested in really and really working on it, then you can and you should.

00:07:56.326 --> 00:07:59.052
Yeah, we have a couple of people like who kind of?

00:07:59.052 --> 00:08:09.721
We have one woman in our in um who's a member of gold in our community, who's a retired, retired high school art teacher and a retired also a retired firefighter, which I didn't know about her till the other night.

00:08:09.721 --> 00:08:11.346
I was like rocky, why didn't you it?

00:08:11.346 --> 00:08:14.425
Like she did a bit about it and I was like how, how did I not anyway?

00:08:14.425 --> 00:08:15.267
She?

00:08:15.267 --> 00:08:16.492
Just she had.

00:08:16.752 --> 00:08:21.663
She was one of those I've always wanted to try it people who now is doing comedy all over north.

00:08:21.663 --> 00:08:29.440
She's from north carolina, all over north Carolina and it's now has been working so hard that she's coming to New York for two to do two solo shows of her own in September.

00:08:29.440 --> 00:08:31.607
So she's like this is her new, this is her new thing.

00:08:31.607 --> 00:08:35.942
Her post retirement not hobby, but like thing, it's her thing.

00:08:35.942 --> 00:08:38.905
She's doing it and for real she is a comedian.

00:08:38.905 --> 00:08:46.434
So and she worked at it, she had the, she 100% had like there's she has ease around it Cause she sort of was also a funny art teacher.

00:08:46.434 --> 00:08:50.980
But she also has worked very, very hard and she's she's going places.

00:08:51.783 --> 00:08:54.148
I love that and congratulations to her.

00:08:54.148 --> 00:08:54.970
That's amazing.

00:08:54.970 --> 00:08:57.681
Yeah, she's amazing Be able to do that.

00:08:57.681 --> 00:09:16.104
Okay, so you told me and I've seen you put this in your materials and on your website I think that you're unleashing the power of funny women and I love that and I think it has a lot of layered meaning to it.

00:09:16.104 --> 00:09:19.552
So tell me some more about the power of being funny.

00:09:20.580 --> 00:09:30.066
We like to say that comedy is power, because when you make people laugh, you make people listen, and so and that's true of everybody really.

00:09:30.066 --> 00:09:43.528
What's interesting, though, is that if I say to you, like quick, think of your class clown, or quick, or if I, if I ask AI to generate a picture of a standup comic, it's a dude always, always, always, always, always, always, always, always.

00:09:43.528 --> 00:10:01.528
Now, that may be a very nice dude and a very funny dude, but it's the default setting and it's a little bit uh, I don't mean to overstate, but it's a little bit like what if we just what if we unleash the power of women, women, women I mean just never mind the funny women just what if we just unleash the?

00:10:01.528 --> 00:10:20.083
It's a, it's a way of saying what if we just unleash the power of women instead of, you know, relegating us to um job, dead-end jobs or under the you know where we're never going to cross the glass ceiling, or what if we actually listen to women talk, or what if we actually, um, treated women as full humans?

00:10:20.504 --> 00:10:45.836
It's a way of saying that comedy isn't the only important cultural force, but it is an important cultural force, so it shapes perceptions, and it has a hierarchy of its own because, as we said, when you make people laugh, you make people listen, and also it's a job and it's an industry.

00:10:45.836 --> 00:10:52.840
So it also matters that women, as in any industry, have power and voice in that industry.

00:10:52.840 --> 00:11:07.221
And because comedy is a cultural force, it matters even more because the faces and the voices the faces we see, the voices we hear matter, yeah, and in terms of our perceptions of who has power and who should have power.

00:11:07.221 --> 00:11:14.553
So those are just a few of the layers that are baked into your very deep first question.

00:11:16.042 --> 00:11:20.332
Well, and I knew that we could maybe dive into this a little bit and that is why I did that.

00:11:20.332 --> 00:11:24.607
So, yes, really fascinating layers there.

00:11:24.607 --> 00:11:29.101
And when you said class clown, it really kind of made me think.

00:11:29.101 --> 00:11:36.501
It's so true that I bet you anybody listening to this is thinking of a kid they knew in elementary school.

00:11:36.501 --> 00:11:48.462
When you say class clown, a boy kid that they knew, and that's what I was thinking of, and then I was thinking, thinking gosh, does that then kind of color for our whole lives?

00:11:48.462 --> 00:11:49.586
Who we think is funny?

00:11:49.586 --> 00:11:57.780
And I think that happens in elementary school sometimes, because boys and girls develop at different rates and the boys are kind of silly and immature and it's not their fault.

00:11:57.780 --> 00:12:02.231
But does that then mean we think of boys as funnier for the rest of our lives?

00:12:02.272 --> 00:12:14.606
that's why, yes, the answer is and I'm not being flip, I don't have it in front of me, but the answer is yes, that's when the gendered differences get kind of formed and hardened.

00:12:14.606 --> 00:12:17.214
Wow, and it's science.

00:12:17.214 --> 00:12:20.442
You can Google it or I'll find it later and you'll put it in the show notes.

00:12:20.442 --> 00:12:40.528
And, to oversimplify with the is, and that's when, and to use just you know, to oversimplify with the gender binary, that's when that's the young age, even starting as young as six, if I'm not mistaken is when boys start to be, girls start to be, boys start to be conditioned to be the ones to make the jokes and girls start to be conditioned to be the ones that laugh at them.

00:12:40.528 --> 00:12:44.839
Wow, and, and you know it's, it's kind of intermingled with.

00:12:44.839 --> 00:12:46.663
You know, do boys always get rewarded for that?

00:12:46.663 --> 00:12:49.469
Not necessarily, like you know, it's often.

00:12:49.469 --> 00:12:50.952
You know the the.

00:12:50.952 --> 00:12:57.783
So, in fairness, you know it's often like the boys who are told to take it easy when actually it's more natural and appropriate for them to be running around.

00:12:57.783 --> 00:12:59.886
You know, I'm I'm oversimplifying tons of?

00:12:59.927 --> 00:13:00.628
of course we are.

00:13:00.628 --> 00:13:01.288
Of course we are.

00:13:01.288 --> 00:13:02.890
We're speaking in stereotype, yeah.

00:13:03.110 --> 00:13:19.635
Yeah, yeah, or well, not stereotypes, but oversimplifications, I should say, of the way of the, the way that the just the cultural messages and behaviors that become ingrained and and girls more often than not are, even though it seems like it's cool to be the class clown, it is not necessarily rewarded for the boys.

00:13:19.635 --> 00:13:20.320
That's what I'm just saying.

00:13:20.320 --> 00:13:39.785
And then, but also you know many of us, those just saying and then, but also you know, many of us, those of us of a certain age or Gen X may in fact be even though times were changing, you know for sure, by then, you know, we may be old enough to remember being encouraged, you know, being encouraged to, you know, sit still and look pretty and probably getting pretty good at it, you know.

00:13:39.785 --> 00:13:48.091
So, not unless we really fought that, or unless we just weren't in that kind of environment, we also absorbed those messages of like, that's not.

00:13:48.091 --> 00:13:49.393
You know, I'm the audience.

00:13:49.553 --> 00:14:02.803
Wow, I'm fascinated by that because I think you're right and I don't think I ever sat down and thought I'm the audience, but I feel it resonates with me when you say that.

00:14:02.803 --> 00:14:23.811
Like, I feel like maybe that's how I've had interactions with people and for me, the interesting thing is I would love to learn how to be more funny, and we're going to talk about that, and I think I am often funny, but yet I still am hearing what you're saying, that maybe I wasn't conditioned to take that role.

00:14:23.811 --> 00:14:25.073
It's very interesting, yeah.

00:14:25.556 --> 00:14:35.589
Yeah, I mean, there's a million exceptions and all those things, but I'm speaking, you know, broadly speaking, those are the cultural messages that, in certain environments, we were raised with.

00:14:36.095 --> 00:14:54.582
Yeah, and if we take another layer to this, unleashing our power, I'm also thinking that in order to be funny whether it's a formal or just an informal setting we have to be self-confident in the fact that whatever we're saying or doing will be funny and people will like it.

00:14:54.582 --> 00:14:59.886
So there's got to be some aspect of confidence in there, which is sort of another layer of power.

00:15:00.368 --> 00:15:15.270
Yeah, yeah, that's true, although the only kind of nuance I would put on that is, I would not view absolute confidence in one's jokes and sense of humor as a prerequisite to taking a crack at comedy.

00:15:15.270 --> 00:15:22.849
Because you know, for even the most seasoned comedians we all you know chestnut Even they have stage fright, even they are shy, even they are nervous, we know this right.

00:15:22.849 --> 00:15:29.908
And also they never know how like one joke could land, could destroy in one place and bomb in another.

00:15:29.908 --> 00:15:31.701
And, by the way, destroying, bomb are the opposite.

00:15:31.701 --> 00:15:36.082
So weird, funny, all those violent metaphors for comedy.

00:15:36.082 --> 00:15:37.779
But whatever, I wonder who made those up.

00:15:37.779 --> 00:15:39.902
I wonder which window runs comedy?

00:15:39.902 --> 00:15:42.842
It's a little bit of a chicken and egg thing.

00:15:42.842 --> 00:15:44.640
And what really seasoned.

00:15:45.263 --> 00:15:54.605
What good comedy, let's put it this way, what good comedy instructors or good comedy mentors are apt to say is that you start with what's funny to you.

00:15:54.605 --> 00:16:09.139
It's not about, and your confidence shouldn't come from whether or not people like you, whether or not does that sound like good advice for life, but also whether or not people liked a joke in any given moment.

00:16:09.139 --> 00:16:16.876
Yes, of course you need to develop your jokes and tweak them and always be fiddling with them, based on audience reaction in the aggregate.

00:16:16.876 --> 00:16:22.275
And yes, of course you're doing jokes to get laughs, I mean, of course, but where you?

00:16:22.275 --> 00:16:25.504
But but where you start is not how do I please the audience?

00:16:25.504 --> 00:16:26.366
How do I please the audience?

00:16:26.366 --> 00:16:27.216
How do I please the audience?

00:16:27.216 --> 00:16:28.238
How do I please the audience?

00:16:28.238 --> 00:16:35.278
It's what do I find hilarious and how can I make that connect with the audience such that they find it hilarious too?

00:16:35.278 --> 00:16:40.015
So confidence is, of course, part of it, but it's not like the biggest, it's honestly not the biggest.

00:16:40.015 --> 00:16:42.162
Like, don't wait for the confidence to do comedy.

00:16:42.482 --> 00:16:54.823
Yeah, but what I'm hearing you say, though, is that it's about trusting yourself and believing that if you find something funny, then maybe somebody else will, and so there's some layer of self confidence in there, for sure.

00:16:55.284 --> 00:16:57.278
Yeah, yeah, I mean at least to get started right.

00:16:57.278 --> 00:17:00.634
But the other but again it's like but also doing it builds confidence.

00:17:00.634 --> 00:17:10.627
So like I'm just the only thing I want to pull out from there is like, don't wait for the confidence to show up If you want to give it a whirl, because it, you know it, you get it from doing it.

00:17:11.414 --> 00:17:20.916
Yeah, that's a great point and, as you said a minute ago, life lesson stop waiting to feel totally ready and confident before you do something, right.

00:17:20.916 --> 00:17:37.516
So let's say that somebody is really wanting to try this comedy thing and I'm going to come back and ask you about the person who, who kind of just wants to be funny in their life, but somebody really wants to get started in comedy.

00:17:37.516 --> 00:17:42.184
What would you recommend that they do to get started?

00:17:43.227 --> 00:17:57.980
Well, obviously, I recommend that they check out a gold comedy, but before that, but in general, you know, know, in anywhere, um, I recommend that they find a place where they feel comfortable and feel that they can be themselves if it's a class, whatever it is, um, and feel that they can truly be themselves.

00:17:57.980 --> 00:18:27.661
One of the reasons that gold exists is often, you know, the, the often, even the most, even the best classes or open mics or whatever that are available, if they are still still tend to be be, you know, dominated by dudes, and even very nice dudes, even whatever, but it, you know, if you're, you know, 55, and you know, are nervous about starting this, you know, even the nicest bunch may not feel like, okay, these are my people, you know to you, they might, but they might not.

00:18:27.661 --> 00:18:36.463
That's why it's important to find a place that really, where you really feel like that, you know, you, there's a mirror shining back to you, you know, where people, where you cause not every audience.

00:18:36.463 --> 00:18:39.617
You don't have to make everyone laugh, not every, even the best comics don't.

00:18:39.617 --> 00:18:41.138
Not everyone is their crowd, you know.

00:18:41.138 --> 00:18:43.321
So, if they're not your crowd, that's fine.

00:18:43.321 --> 00:18:58.101
You, you, I say, find your crowd, whether it's meaning both your audience and your crew and so find people who you feel comfortable with, who you feel like you make mistakes in front of, who you can have your jokes fall flat in front of as you develop them.

00:18:58.101 --> 00:19:08.682
For many people, that is gold comedy and that's what we're designed to be, but that's the secret sauce that we are going for, and specifically no bro vibe.

00:19:08.682 --> 00:19:18.116
I mean that's why we're designed to welcome anybody, anybody and everybody, but what we don't welcome is a bro vibe, because that's mostly what people are trying to escape.

00:19:18.116 --> 00:19:21.787
So I recommend finding a place where you feel comfortable taking a class.

00:19:21.787 --> 00:19:24.280
Taking a class is always what I recommend to people, always.

00:19:24.280 --> 00:19:28.078
It's almost any comedian you talk to is often where they got their start.

00:19:28.078 --> 00:19:44.846
The other thing I recommend is, if you're not there yet, I kind of made this up based on the idea of we all know gratitude journals, and one thing that I sometimes recommend and I haven't thought of a cute name for it, yet you can DM me if you think of one is things in my life that could be maybe funny one day.

00:19:44.887 --> 00:19:55.660
Journal meaning jotting down whether it's whatever your jam is, you know, on your notes app or on a notebook that you carry with you, like just things that happen during the day.

00:19:55.660 --> 00:20:03.361
That aren't necessarily funny things, you know, it's not like I slipped on a banana peel, you know but like things you notice.

00:20:03.361 --> 00:20:11.155
Things you notice Like the subway voice sounds weird, you know.

00:20:11.155 --> 00:20:16.038
Or just you know, awkwardly balancing 20, you know, when you're walking with like 20 different bags and also putting on lipstick or I don't, you know, I don't, I'm just making stuff up.

00:20:16.038 --> 00:20:18.246
They're not cause, they're not fully formed jokes.

00:20:18.246 --> 00:20:31.291
They're not jokes, they're just like things that you notice during the day that are either awkward or challenge, even just challenging, um, or could be slapstick, sure, or even just like something funny.

00:20:31.291 --> 00:20:34.342
You text to your friend and you're like wait a minute, that was kind of funny actually, you know.

00:20:34.734 --> 00:20:39.721
And but my point is mostly they don't have to be jokes yet and or even just like stray thoughts.

00:20:39.721 --> 00:20:49.785
You know, like coming into the kitchen and being like what if I just didn't do the dish, you know, and then, and then just like write that down and then later you come back to it and then you actually start writing a joke around.

00:20:49.785 --> 00:20:53.441
It Know literally what would happen and that's where the jokes would come from.

00:20:53.441 --> 00:20:56.240
Right, literally what would happen.

00:20:56.240 --> 00:20:57.994
But I'm getting ahead of myself.

00:20:58.115 --> 00:21:30.479
My point is, if you are able to jot down 1, 2, 3, 4, 10 things a day that are just possibly material, and not trying to be funny or looking for funny silly things or just things that just occur to you, that you even write down with a question mark, you know, like like me with my cat you know, my cat, literally like I went to open my lipstick before this, I got in the zoom with you and I noticed that when my cat knocked it off the table, all of the lipstick wound up in the top part.

00:21:30.479 --> 00:21:32.202
No, it's also because it's really hot.

00:21:32.202 --> 00:21:35.676
So, like my lipstick is so hot that it just melts, you know.

00:21:35.676 --> 00:21:40.915
So that's, I don't know, it's not a joke yet, but but like lipstick melted in heat, you know.

00:21:40.915 --> 00:21:53.740
But when you go back to it you can see patterns, you can see ideas, you can see things that, like, you don't even have to write jokes yet you could just be like, oh, if I wanted to write jokes, I wouldn't have to start with a blank page.

00:21:54.441 --> 00:22:08.202
Yes, I I love this idea and I love that you are sort of likening it to a gratitude journal, because one of the things that I learned, maybe last year or so, is this idea of a glimmer.

00:22:08.202 --> 00:22:09.867
I don't know if you've heard the word glimmer.

00:22:09.928 --> 00:22:10.348
Oh, yeah, yeah.

00:22:10.835 --> 00:22:34.162
Yeah, and, and what you're describing is kind of like that, and so I know, if you're listening, you've heard me say glimmer before, but just in case you haven't, it's the idea of looking for things in your life, little moments that make you happy the sunrise or the whatever, whatever, the smell of something, and it trains your brain to look for more, and so that's what you're saying.

00:22:34.162 --> 00:22:42.108
Yeah, train your brain to look for funny or kind of odd things that happen.

00:22:42.275 --> 00:23:03.481
But what a nice light energy that is in general and I love that Yep, and as with noticing glimmers, it cultivates the habit of noticing that you in general, and and I love that Yep, and as with noticing glimmers, it's the it cultivates the habit of noticing that you're noticing, because I swear to God and I am, I am 100% sure that you've said this If you don't write it down, you think you're going to remember, but you will not have to.

00:23:03.481 --> 00:23:05.748
You have to write it down.

00:23:05.748 --> 00:23:12.446
The only way I'm going to remember the thing about the lipstick is that we're recording this you know, like, like you, will you?

00:23:12.707 --> 00:23:16.423
and you don't even have to be as old as we are to um to to forget.

00:23:16.423 --> 00:23:17.681
You have to write it down.

00:23:17.681 --> 00:23:28.851
I don't care what system you use, I don't care if you use voice notes, but whatever it is, and the bar has to be for the, for the comedy't write anything down.

00:23:28.851 --> 00:23:34.724
The bar is just like anything that like could be a thing and in fact, okay, I'll give you this gold was gonna.

00:23:34.724 --> 00:23:41.115
One of the things that one of the swag items we want to make is a notebook that say on the front, there's something there.

00:23:41.115 --> 00:23:42.801
So I love that.

00:23:42.801 --> 00:23:45.351
Yeah, we already have pens that say write that down.

00:23:45.351 --> 00:23:48.097
And then the notebook would say there's something there and like that's it.

00:23:48.097 --> 00:23:48.538
There.

00:23:48.538 --> 00:23:50.143
Just has to be something there, that's it.

00:23:50.723 --> 00:24:07.488
Yes, I see how this is powerful and then the combination of taking some sort of class and learning how to then create this into an actual joke or something that you could do with it would kind of come together.

00:24:07.929 --> 00:24:11.759
Exactly, and yeah, because then you're basically you're doing your pre homework.

00:24:11.960 --> 00:24:13.586
Yeah, yeah, okay.

00:24:13.586 --> 00:24:33.109
So let's let's kind of flip it now to somebody who maybe isn't necessarily wanting to be on a stage and tell jokes and be a comedian in that way, but wants to be more funny in their interactions with people, whether it's work or friends or who knows what.

00:24:33.109 --> 00:24:35.820
What would be your advice to them?

00:24:36.121 --> 00:24:36.281
Sure.

00:24:36.281 --> 00:24:43.747
Well, first of all, one thing that's a little bit of an indirect answer is just a reminder that when we say comedy, we say so many things.

00:24:43.747 --> 00:24:45.878
We might be saying stand up.

00:24:45.878 --> 00:24:47.544
We might be saying writing for late night.

00:24:47.544 --> 00:24:49.116
We might be saying writing, writing sketch.

00:24:49.116 --> 00:24:49.698
We might be saying improv.

00:24:49.698 --> 00:24:50.761
We might be saying writing for late night.

00:24:50.761 --> 00:24:51.683
We might be saying writing, writing sketch.

00:24:51.683 --> 00:24:52.527
We might be saying improv.

00:24:52.527 --> 00:24:54.913
We might be saying working for brands, working in advertising.

00:24:55.174 --> 00:24:57.667
Um, you know, three out of four consumers want their brands to be funny.

00:24:57.667 --> 00:24:59.355
Which is funny is actually funny.

00:24:59.355 --> 00:25:02.468
Interesting because people say I'm totally on a side note.

00:25:02.468 --> 00:25:03.673
People say it actually.

00:25:03.673 --> 00:25:06.842
It's not just because it makes their brands more entertaining.

00:25:06.842 --> 00:25:10.863
It actually there's science about this creates trust with a brand.

00:25:10.863 --> 00:25:16.665
When a brand is funny and the same is true of, like, funny managers and leaders.

00:25:16.665 --> 00:25:26.962
It's not just like they cracked me up, it's partly that, but it builds trust because you feel a kinship, because you sort of you're in on their joke and they're in on your joke.

00:25:26.962 --> 00:25:28.266
You get each other.

00:25:28.266 --> 00:25:37.304
Yes, so I know a lot of comics who, either on the side or as their full-time jobs like this is what they do now write social for brands.

00:25:37.304 --> 00:25:40.157
So even that I would include that in comedy.

00:25:40.157 --> 00:25:47.866
So first of all, for your listeners, if you're curious about what kind of comedy at all in any sort of professional realm might be something to explore.

00:25:47.886 --> 00:25:49.397
Oh, there's also TV writing.

00:25:49.397 --> 00:25:52.306
We talk about TV writing, writing a pilot we have.

00:25:52.306 --> 00:25:59.025
We have women writing their first pilots in their fifties, all the time at gold, and even selling them and having them go into production.

00:25:59.025 --> 00:25:59.675
So you know.

00:25:59.675 --> 00:26:00.176
So there's that.

00:26:00.176 --> 00:26:08.545
So, first of all, if you're like comedy but I don't want to be on stage, click, click away from podcasts, I'm like no, there's so many ways, there's a million things.

00:26:08.545 --> 00:26:10.028
I see that, yeah.

00:26:10.429 --> 00:26:10.648
Yeah.

00:26:10.729 --> 00:26:34.779
Okay, but your next question, to answer your next question, to answer it sort of a little bit backwards for sure, comedy skills are life skills, for sure, and this is also science, that learning to training yourself, whether it be a professional or or just with the skills, science, science, science helps you think faster, write sharper, read a room, listen better, all those things.

00:26:34.779 --> 00:26:45.164
But to turn that around the other way, some of the components of sort of being funny in your daily life come from listening and reading the room.

00:26:45.164 --> 00:26:57.479
People think it comes from always coming up with the wisecrack, but the ones who always come up with the wisecrack are the ones who are listening and reading the room not the ones who walked into a room writing a joke already.

00:26:58.260 --> 00:27:19.688
So, and those wisecracks don't even always have to be hilarious, and even if it's, what I like to say is it's you know, if you're, I always tell you, like, open a keynote with a joke, which is very iffy advice to me Like, of course you should, but like that also makes people open keynotes with terrible jokes because they feel pressure to like write a joke, yeah, and then it feels awkward and weird.

00:27:19.688 --> 00:27:23.826
Yeah, I think people need more guidance around what that means and what will work and what won't.

00:27:23.826 --> 00:27:35.307
But even just like I don't know in a meeting, like if just it often comes down to being the one who's willing to say what's so, like, if it's freezing, say it's freezing, it doesn't even have to be a joke.

00:27:35.307 --> 00:27:43.878
Like anyone else need mittens, you know, like and P, and then people kind of relax and the connect with you and it puts others at ease.

00:27:43.878 --> 00:27:47.865
But it comes from reading the room, not from walking in there ready to make them laugh.

00:27:47.865 --> 00:27:52.974
So it's actually the bar is pretty low and just the bar is just somewhere around.

00:27:53.176 --> 00:27:56.442
Being willing to say out loud what you think might be on other people's minds.

00:27:56.442 --> 00:28:04.405
Yes, people will love you if you're the one to like gently break the awkward silence or say the thing that everyone's thinking about, not saying Stuff like that.

00:28:04.405 --> 00:28:18.320
So that's one thing I would kind of even if you don't do it right away like watch and listen for those moments, like practice reading the room.

00:28:18.320 --> 00:28:19.124
And women, honestly, I really really try.

00:28:19.124 --> 00:28:23.317
I do not take lightly you know kind of women are better at this and and just sort of do sort of lazy or oversimplified.

00:28:23.317 --> 00:28:26.263
You know differences between men and women, but it is.

00:28:26.463 --> 00:28:39.884
I think it is fair to say that one of the things we are trained to do is read a room, like the kind of the chestnut about how, like you know you walk into a party and you immediately know who's who's seeing who, who's flirting with whom, who's.

00:28:39.884 --> 00:28:42.135
You know who's who's in charge, who's like.

00:28:42.135 --> 00:28:47.325
We just not like often, not always, you know we're just it's fair to say that we're trained to do that.

00:28:47.325 --> 00:28:57.199
So my other point being, like it's not the heart, so it's to read a room, it's just.

00:28:57.199 --> 00:28:58.001
Then what are you going to say?

00:28:58.001 --> 00:28:58.403
That's amusing.

00:28:58.403 --> 00:28:59.989
It doesn't have to be funny, but amusing and gives people.

00:28:59.989 --> 00:29:01.734
It doesn't have to be a punchline, just an observation.

00:29:01.734 --> 00:29:09.621
That is likely what everyone is thinking and feeling at that moment is a great is a, I think, a pretty safe, a pretty safe place to start.

00:29:10.041 --> 00:29:21.528
And maybe, if that observation is made with a little bit of I don't even know how to describe it, but just like a little bit of humor, a lighter tone or a smile or whatever, maybe that does it.

00:29:22.075 --> 00:29:23.459
Yeah, or just thinking of like what's?

00:29:23.459 --> 00:29:38.506
What's the slightly funny way I could say this Like, instead of saying like what I said before, like like okay, see, it's cold in here, but no one's saying anything, maybe we should read everyone's putting on their, putting on their pashminas, and you know, maybe we should, you know, but something I mean, you know.

00:29:38.506 --> 00:29:46.759
And so instead of saying like is everyone else freezing, like okay, okay, what, how can I say that with one specific word that's slightly funnier, like does that have any mittens?

00:29:46.759 --> 00:29:50.727
You know before, like mittens is funny, but it's not like a joke.

00:29:51.048 --> 00:29:53.702
Right, right, adding humor to what's happening.

00:29:54.015 --> 00:30:01.016
And just thinking of, like what's one specific word I could use that heightens this or you know so little things like that, little things like that I also.

00:30:01.016 --> 00:30:12.738
I think it's helpful also to notice, like when you're with the people, like, notice how it feels to be with the people with whom you're your funniest and notice, like, what kinds of jokes are you making?

00:30:12.738 --> 00:30:13.859
What gets a laugh?

00:30:13.859 --> 00:30:14.560
What do you usually?

00:30:14.560 --> 00:30:16.604
What's your vibe on your, on your group chat?

00:30:16.604 --> 00:30:17.545
Like, what's your style?

00:30:17.545 --> 00:30:18.366
What do you you know?

00:30:18.366 --> 00:30:18.747
What are you?

00:30:18.747 --> 00:30:19.608
What's your?

00:30:19.608 --> 00:30:20.871
Are you sarcastic?

00:30:20.871 --> 00:30:22.381
Are you dry?

00:30:22.381 --> 00:30:23.920
Are you silly?

00:30:23.920 --> 00:30:25.424
Are you know what's your?

00:30:25.424 --> 00:30:35.765
Just kind of notice that that's you know.

00:30:35.765 --> 00:30:37.328
That's how you're funny.

00:30:37.328 --> 00:30:40.182
And are there places where you could?

00:30:40.182 --> 00:30:50.432
Are there other contexts that you can find to kind of tentatively and begin to tentatively, begin to apply that same kind of approach, because you already know you got it.

00:30:50.859 --> 00:30:52.366
Yes, that's a great point.

00:30:52.366 --> 00:30:57.471
Okay, so one of the pieces of advice I've gotten before is to take an improv class.

00:30:57.471 --> 00:30:58.396
What are your thoughts?

00:30:58.457 --> 00:31:01.644
Oh yeah, sure, yeah, we offer improv.

00:31:01.644 --> 00:31:06.275
In fact, fun fact about Gold, she's also Gen X.

00:31:06.275 --> 00:31:09.163
Actually, our improv teacher came to us as a member.

00:31:09.163 --> 00:31:15.143
She's a SAG-AFTRA actor, she's an improv instructor and she came to us because she wanted to try standup.

00:31:15.143 --> 00:31:27.970
And now she says she says now I'm winning awards all over Louisville where she lives and environs and hosting rooms and staying up late all night and I blame you, lynn, because now she's a successful standup.

00:31:28.099 --> 00:31:35.167
Anyway, I personally feel more comfortable with standup and improv, but so I'm not an expert on improv, but improv does do.

00:31:35.167 --> 00:31:37.182
All the things they say, absolutely, you know, full, full stop.

00:31:37.182 --> 00:31:44.262
So in terms of getting them out of your head, certainly with listening all of the things, yeah, you know, certainly.

00:31:44.262 --> 00:31:48.560
Yeah, having to listen, having to build instead of block, you know, all those things are people.

00:31:48.560 --> 00:31:49.462
People swear by it.

00:31:49.462 --> 00:31:56.786
So I just think my only sort of personal opinion and this is not a dig on improv at all, so please, nobody at me.

00:31:56.786 --> 00:32:00.564
And again, when we're talking about comedy, here we're talking about all the kinds of comedy.

00:32:00.584 --> 00:32:05.125
But there's something really, if you go back to comedy and power, there's just something interesting.

00:32:05.125 --> 00:32:17.862
And women, there's something interesting to me about stand-up and women and the idea of being alone, not only being, you know, like being alone on a stage where people, especially men, have to listen to you.

00:32:17.862 --> 00:32:23.646
Being alone on a stage where people, especially men, have to listen to you, ah, and you're asking me which you are about, gender and comedy and all that stuff.

00:32:23.646 --> 00:32:34.395
Women also know how to play on a team, true, or at least, to put it another way, it's fair to say that that is a thing we are trained to do.

00:32:34.395 --> 00:32:38.523
Yes, love improv, everybody, please, do improv.

00:32:38.523 --> 00:32:41.329
But when you're asking me about how gender fits in, I think there's something very.

00:32:41.329 --> 00:33:00.721
I just think there's something extra juicy not bad about improv, but extra juicy about the power of standup, yes, and how it runs counter to the things that again to oversimplify with the binary, how it runs counter to the ways that both women and men have been trained to relate to themselves and each other.

00:33:01.303 --> 00:33:02.968
Really interesting yeah.

00:33:03.690 --> 00:33:04.672
But once again, I love improv.

00:33:06.441 --> 00:33:07.463
I think she loves improv.

00:33:07.463 --> 00:33:19.521
Okay, so you've mentioned it a couple of times, but if someone is curious about what you're offering with Gold Comedy and wants to find you or connect with you, how can they do that?

00:33:20.564 --> 00:33:21.746
Oh, thank you for asking.

00:33:21.746 --> 00:33:24.111
It's super easy.

00:33:24.111 --> 00:33:28.728
We you can visit our website, goldcomedycom G-O-L-D comedy.

00:33:28.728 --> 00:33:31.356
You can find us on Instagram, gold comedy.

00:33:31.356 --> 00:33:31.837
Same thing.

00:33:31.837 --> 00:33:33.622
We're also on Facebook and TikTok.

00:33:33.622 --> 00:33:34.804
You can find and YouTube.

00:33:34.804 --> 00:33:39.692
You can find all that easily from our home base If you DM.

00:33:39.692 --> 00:33:40.394
Here's some.

00:33:40.394 --> 00:33:45.569
If you DM me, I'm also Lynn Harris on Instagram and also comedy on Instagram.

00:33:45.569 --> 00:33:54.064
If you email me through the website or DM me on social and tell me you heard me on this podcast, we'll get you a little discount on whatever it is you want to do.

00:33:54.064 --> 00:34:03.249
We run mostly by annual membership, which includes everything all of the classes, workshops, celebrity speaker series, open mics, just all.

00:34:03.249 --> 00:34:07.286
We also have premium classes that overlap but work a little bit differently.

00:34:07.286 --> 00:34:15.740
So, depending on what you're curious about, we'll figure out some sort of 10% something for you if you tell me that you found me through this podcast.

00:34:16.282 --> 00:34:20.994
I love it All right, and I'll make sure to put all that information in the show notes too, so to make it easy.

00:34:20.994 --> 00:34:40.853
Okay, then the last question that I want to kind of wrap up with, because I'm always imagining somebody's listening to this while they're doing dishes or folding the laundry or driving the car or whatever, and they're not going to remember every single thing, although you can just re-listen, right, but what is the?

00:34:40.853 --> 00:34:45.891
Oh my goodness, I really want to make sure they remember at least this one thing.

00:34:45.891 --> 00:34:47.943
What is that in your opinion?

00:34:48.545 --> 00:34:50.208
Everybody can be funny.

00:34:50.208 --> 00:34:51.853
You're probably already funny.

00:34:51.853 --> 00:34:55.063
You don't have to be a certain way before you get funny.

00:34:55.063 --> 00:34:58.206
You don't have to be less shy, you don't have to be more confident.

00:34:58.206 --> 00:35:15.731
You just have to be willing to recognize that there is already material, as we call it, every minute and every day of your life, and be curious about how you might turn that into comedy that is unique to you, which is really the only way you can do it.

00:35:16.619 --> 00:35:18.485
Oh, fantastic answer.

00:35:18.485 --> 00:35:19.307
I love that.

00:35:19.307 --> 00:35:32.422
It's such to me, it's such an empowering concept to think that we can all be funny in our own way, and I guess that sort of circles us right back around to the way we started this episode about this whole thing being empowering.

00:35:32.422 --> 00:35:33.485
So that's fantastic.

00:35:33.485 --> 00:35:35.570
Lynn, thank you so much for joining me.

00:35:35.570 --> 00:35:37.023
I have loved this conversation.

00:35:37.023 --> 00:35:38.047
Thank you so much.

00:35:38.548 --> 00:35:43.847
Okay, what I want you to take from this episode is absolutely what Lynn just said.

00:35:43.847 --> 00:35:48.070
Anyone can be funny, and that includes you.

00:35:48.070 --> 00:36:09.063
Yes, and I also want you to keep in mind this idea of keeping a list, a journal, a notebook whatever you want to call it of interesting or maybe there's something to that kind of things that happen in your life, whether you ever do anything with it or not.

00:36:09.063 --> 00:36:22.905
I love this idea so much because sometimes we resist the idea of a gratitude journal a little bit, because we think I'm just going to be writing down the same thing every day the sunset was beautiful, the coffee tastes good.

00:36:22.905 --> 00:36:41.864
Maybe it becomes a gratitude slash, funny stuff journal and we don't want to necessarily call it that, because I take her point that it's just these sort of odd little things that happen that we think maybe there's something there sort of odd little things that happen that we think maybe there's something there.

00:36:41.864 --> 00:36:42.686
So I was thinking the other day.

00:36:42.686 --> 00:37:09.835
I live in a courtyard of townhouses and there was a new family moving in the other day and all of us inside my house and probably inside the neighbor's houses, had our noses basically pressed to the window because we noticed they weren't moving in with a moving truck, they just had a flatbed off a pickup truck and a tarp over it and we were trying to figure out who was moving in and we couldn't pick from the people who it was.

00:37:09.835 --> 00:37:17.443
I might write that down on my list, because what would I do with it, I don't know, but when I look back it will amuse me.

00:37:17.443 --> 00:37:21.583
And even if that's all I ever do with this list, that's powerful.

00:37:22.204 --> 00:37:35.775
We are taking the conversation further in Patreon Lynn and I took a little bit more time to really go into detail on the how of going forward with this.

00:37:35.775 --> 00:37:42.001
So make sure that you are hanging with us in the Midlife Pivot Patreon community.

00:37:42.001 --> 00:37:44.668
It's patreoncom slash mindyourmidlife.

00:37:44.668 --> 00:37:46.092
You can grab the link in the show notes.

00:37:46.092 --> 00:37:54.043
I'll see you there and you'll get to hear the rest of that discussion and then, wherever you are listening, if you would tap the five stars.

00:37:54.043 --> 00:37:54.965
That would be amazing.

00:37:54.965 --> 00:38:00.302
If you're listening on Apple, if you would take a moment and give a review.

00:38:00.302 --> 00:38:09.204
Those reviews help tell Apple that more people might be interested in hearing this podcast, and that is so amazing.

00:38:09.204 --> 00:38:27.693
I am thankful for every single review that comes in and, in the meantime, keep remembering midlife is your time to slow down, notice your life, what's going on around you, what's going on in your head, and create something amazing.

Lynn Harris Profile Photo

Lynn Harris

CEO/founder, GOLD Comedy

Lynn Harris is a culture-shifting producer, award-winning journalist, and author/co-author of six books, whose comedy and campaigns for social justice and gender equity have changed laws and conversations from Capitol Hill to NASCAR. She is founder and CEO of GOLD Comedy—the comedy school, professional network, and content studio where women and non-binary creators grow their comedy careers, build powerful communities, and make funny stuff. Harris co-created Breakup Girl (acquired by Oxygen), one of the first multiplatform internet success stories, and served as the first VP of communications at global human rights group Breakthrough, where her blend of humor and advocacy powered some of the team’s most effective U.S. campaigns. She has also worked as a Tonya Harding lookalike, which is a long story.